Clam is a system extension (INIT) for System 7 which eliminates the icons in the Apple menu. The menu retains its System 7 functionality; it just doesn’t have the icons.
Why do I want it?
Good question. Some people have complained that it takes a long time to draw the icons in the Apple menu, especially when they’re in a zillion bits of color. Some poor engineer at Apple probably spent hours making those icons work right, thereby guaranteeing, through a little-known corollary to Murphy’s Law, that some people wouldn’t like them.
How do I install it?
Find the Clam icon. Drop it into your System Folder. If the Mac asks you if it’s OK to put Clam into the Extensions folder, say yes. Tough, eh? (You can also drop Clam directly into your Extensions folder.)
How do I get rid of it?
Find your Extensions folder. (It’s in your System Folder.) Open the Extensions folder. Find Clam. Drag Clam onto the Desktop or throw it away. Tough, eh?
What if I get to missin’ my cute little icons?
Hold down a shift key before clicking in the menu bar. Your icons will be drawn in the Apple menu for the duration of that menu selection.
How much do I owe you?
If you like and use Clam, you owe me a convoluted debt. I don’t want your money; I want to help other people who want your money. You have two options.
Option 1 Find a shareware program you’ve been using for a few months and haven’t paid for. If you’re honest, you don’t have any of these—go to option 2.
If you do have one of these programs, dig up the registration/order information. Print it out. Write a check. Mail the whole package to the author or wherever else s/he wants you to send it. In other words, pay for some shareware.
If you’ve never done it before, trust me, it feels good. It makes authors feel good, too. You may be the only person who writes an author a check, and if you are, your check is all the more crucial.
To make this painfully clear, if you like and use Clam (and qualify for Option 1), you are legally obligated to pay for some other shareware.
Option 2 Make a contribution to the EFF. EFF stands for Electronic Frontier Foundation. The EFF is a non-profit private organization dedicated to protecting your electronic rights.
The EFF…
• lobbies Congress to fund the right kind of national public high-speed telecommunications network.
• explains to legislators why creating commissions to oversee software engineers would kill projects like Clam and a lot of other computer creativity, as well.
• defends people in computer-related legal action brought by over-zealous prosecutors who violate the Constitution in their panicked ignorance of computing.
In short, the EFF keeps the fingers of misguided bureaucrats out of your technological affairs.
I’m a proud paid-up member of the EFF, but I don’t work for them and I don’t formally represent them. I’ve included a text file about the EFF and an EFF order form with this package. Both should be printable with TeachText. If you’re interested in more info about the EFF, by all means contact them via email and ask. They can send you reams of stuff quite easily.
What if Clam doesn’t work?
If it doesn’t work, email me.
I need specific information. You can give me varying degrees of specific information, each of which will get you a corresponding degree of technical attention on this end. The information I need can be divided into chunks—the more chunks you give me, the more likely I am to prick up my ears and try to fix the problem you’re experiencing.
• Macintosh model, System version, extensions you’re running
• say whether the problem goes away when you disable your other extensions
• say which extension (or combination) is causing the problem
• describe the problem extension’s functionality in detail
• describe how to reproduce the problem in detail
I can be reached at thousands upon thousands of email addresses. The best one is America Online. Write to EC Tech. If you haven’t got AOL, that’s really too bad—try internet. Internet mail is accessible from any number of places. Examples:
AppleLink sbanet!kathouse!gurgle@internet#
gurgle@well.sf.ca.us@internet#
CompuServe >INTERNET: sbanet!kathouse!gurgle
>INTERNET: gurgle@well.sf.ca.us
(The sbanet address is probably faster.)
Don’t try to track me down in person. I will get very hostile. When little Camp Fire Girls come to my door begging for money to bury their dead great-grandfather, I kick them down the stone stairs and laugh.
What if I want to put Clam on a CD ROM or sell diskettes that include Clam?
If you’re a non-profit user group, then congratulations, you win. Go ahead and do it. If you’re selling the CD ROM or the diskettes for profit, forget it. I don’t like you very much.
Redistributors in particular need to avoid contacting me personally. Send me email. Email replies sent from an account with one of my passwords will have to be sufficient permission for your lawyers.
(For the rest of you, it’s not that I think Clam is so wonderful that people will be beating down my door. It’s not so wonderful. But you’d be surprised how many of these disk people there are out there. Back in the days when I played the shareware game, I’d get far more inquiries from re-distributors than actual payments. I used to ask them if they liked the program they were asking about. They always said yes, of course. “Then why haven’t you registered?” I’d ask. Silence. More recently, they’ve called me about some of my freeware. “Your program will be distributed to thousands of sites it wouldn’t otherwise reach!”, they’d coo, trying to persuade me to sign a frightening release form. I’d say, “It’s free. That doesn’t get me anything.” More silence.)
If you’re an online service that doesn’t associate a charge with this specific program, you may keep this program online.
In general, if you would like to redistribute this program in any way, you must pass along all of the files you received it with.
Who did the wonderful icon?
My Muse, Donna Lee, did the wonderful icon. We were going to have the clam open with a little Apple logo inside, but then we realized 1) Apple Legal would probably send us a cease and desist letter, and 2) clams don’t make pearls, so the joke would be dumb. (Later we realized that a letter from Apple Legal would just make us fit in with everyone else, but the pearl business was a real bummer.)
Why the heck is it called Clam?
The letters in Clam stand for CLean Apple Menu. Heck, naming these things is half the reason I do ‘em.
